Surviving Thanksgiving

I truly must be a survivor. After going to Turkey and living through numerous taxi cab rides(in Turkey there are no speed limit signs, no one sees lane lines, stop light are not laws but merely recommendations, and traffic police are there only to collect money if they actually care about how you are driving, catching some kind of bug that my oldest daughter so kindly shared with me (thank you Sesame Street for "It's Nice to Share" idea that it gave to all my children growing up), and having five extra boys in the house and three extra girls in the house for our Thanksgiving holiday I realize I can survive almost anything. Even 2012.

My perplexity comes from our now 17 year old daughter whom decided that she didn't like having extra people in the house at all. She didn't even like having her paternal grandparents here. "It's not like they care at all about me," she said. My concern was that she spouted off with her grandfather standing directly in front of us.

Honestly I can understand how young boys might get on her nerves, not that they paid her much attention. They were loud and energetic, but that's how boys are supposed to be. However, I can't understand her disdain over her grandparents and her aunt. She was a bit miffed by the fact that her uncle couldn't remember her name, but hey, he's a guy. He's lucky to remember his own name at times, I'm sure.

I think what it boiled down to is that she wasn't the center of attention. She felt the boys were more important than she was. She also didn't like the fact that her grandmother brought up her natural mother and was talking about her. She hasn't acknowledged her in several years now and doesn't show signs of forgiving her for past transgressions yet. It's a very hard issue to come to terms with. I know several women that have "mother" problems that they never have gotten over.

I think it's tough being a teenage girl. You have all those hormones running rampant and no where to release them. You feel like you're lonely all the time even when people are in the house. No matter what you say you are misunderstood. You have to constantly watch what you wear and what you say. Boys, on the other hand, can pretty much wear whatever they want. If they don't shower and jump out of bed crumpled it's still cool. If a girl tries that they get snickered at all through the day and rumors start running rampant.

But after saving the cockatoo and giving him therapy after new boys came in and thought he was carnival shooting toy, the smaller dogs and the cat were relieved and came out of hiding, and finding dishes and food in very clever hiding places things are getting back to normal... or as normal as it ever gets here.

Honestly, I do miss Turkey. It was wonderful there. I miss the people, mostly. But I love being home with my family and friends. I enjoy being in a place where I can drive to the store at a reasonable speed and where I can mostly count on people stopping for a red light.

Now that the turkey has been downed, two birthdays are almost out of the way, and the kids are back to the school grind we can get ready for Christmas. (sigh) But at least we'll have most of our family together, and for me that's the bestest part of the holidays.

***Note: The picture is of our favorite taxi driver whom we fondly call Benjamin. His name is actually Ebu Bakir which I mistakenly heard as "Abel Baker." I told him he looked like a Benjamin and he said, "Okay. I'll be Benjamin." He's totally awesome... :) and can drive better than most race car drivers I've seen.

Mother Kills 8 On NY Hwy

Being a parent is not an easy task. We actually and literally hold lives in our hands. I imagine that when this woman took on the responsibility of motherhood she took it on with love and commitment. After all her friends and family speak of her fondly and as a good mother. So what would have happened that would have made her drink, do drugs, and drive with children in the car? In the minivan with her were her two children, ages 5 and 2, and also her three nieces ages 7, 8, and 9. Four of the five children were killed. Because of her actions and decision to drive in this condition many lives are changed forever. One mother and father no longer has their three children, lost a niece, and a sister. The woman drove the wrong way on a highway for two miles. She had enough sense left to call and tell her brother she wasn't feeling well. He told her to pull over and wait. She kept going.

Diane Schuler was drunk on vodka and high on marijuana when she drove the wrong way onto a New York highway and slammed into an SUV, authorities said Tuesday. Schuler, 36, and seven other people were killed, including her 2-year-old daughter, Erin. Son Bryan, 5, was the sole survivor. Schuler's husband, Daniel, shown in this family photo, was not in the minivan.

We don't know what possessed this woman to make the actions she did. The fact of the matter is that an adult has the right to make their own decisions - good or bad, but the decisions we make when they involve minors need to be the best possible ones. Past good parenting does not excuse present bad parenting. Wrong decisions may even take away our ability to parent at all.

My heart goes out to the parents of the lost children, but especially to the little boy who lost his mother and little sister. His childhood is changed forever.